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| User: | notouchnosee (414459) Don't Touch Me
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| Name: | Colin Matthews | ||||||||||
| Bio: | PLAYER Name/Alias: Dee Age: 33 Contact Info: diedreb@gmail.com Time Zone: PST CHARACTER: Name: Colin Matthews Age: 26 (turned at age 25) D.O.B.: November 18th Blood Type: O + (Vampire) Race: Vampire (Harbringers of Bedlam) Level: Powers: None beyond his bloodline Physical Description: Colin stands about six feet tall, with a lanky build. His blond hair is about shoulder length and unkempt, often dirty. His face in angular and his features are a little sunken. He looks like he doesn't sleep enough and is possibly on something. His gaze can be uncomfortable to meet, a lot of times, it's like he's looking at you but not seeing you. His eyes are blue, and his skin when it's clean is pale. It usually isn't. He wears whatever he can find that fits. Warmth isn't an issue, so he doesn't wear many layers. He has a beaten up army duffle that he keeps everything he owns in. Which isn't much, really. Some changes of clothes, a few odds and ends that he isn't even sure why he has them and his wallet with pictures of his family and his ID. He doesn't need anything else, really. Personality: Colin is quiet and insular, keeping to himself as much as possible. He avoids physical contact with almost everyone and everything, alternately keeping hands shoved in his pockets or handling something he dug out from them. He seems haunted, beaten down and sad. The thoughts, memories and feelings that aren't his constantly run through his head, distracting him, reminding him of what he's become. Worse than a monster, worse than a madman. He's a soul sucking, insane monster who brings only painful death to those he feeds on. Self-loathing doesn't even begin to describe it. He's got a little hope though. He doesn't want to go to hell, he doesn't want to be evil. He's heard of things, paths he can walk, that'll eventually take him to Heaven. Or something like it. If he can find his way back from damnation. Taoism and Buddhism don't offer insant forgiveness or even salvation, but they're offering him more than burning in hell for something he never asked for. It's slow going for him, though. Every person he reads, every memory that isn't his, chips away at his sanity. He forgets which ones are his at time, what's real and what's not. His sleep is fraught with daymares of the screams of his victims as he sees their lives flash before his eyes. The lives he destroyed. It's no wonder he's losing his grip and clinging fiercely to what hope he can find. That said, he refuses to be the monster he thinks he is as much as he can. He understands what the teachings are saying enough to start on the right path. He helps the people around him as much as he can, giving them food and money when he comes across it. He drags other bums into shelters in the freezing cold, helps lost tourists get out of the bad part of town he lives in. He visits the graves of his victims, leaving flowers and apologizing for what he did to them. He keeps tabs on his sister and her baby girl, looking after them as much as he can, like he promised Robbie. He never lets them see him, but he watches over them. He has some small inner peace, a gift from another vampire who set him on the path. He clings to that when he can. Any hope is hope, right? He doesn't need anything, anything but blood. And he hates what that need causes. He feeds as little as he can get away with, with makes him prone to bloodlust when he smells it. His mind is breaking slowly, and he can't stand to be confined. It reminds him of what his sire did to him, how he 'intitiated' him, tried to turn him into a true monster. He gets dangerously violent when confined. He hates other vampires, especially the ones who like what they are. How can anybody like being a monster? He just wants everyone to stay away. Staying away from him is best for everybody. Him. Them. His broken mind. When he really needs blood, he goes after the criminals who prey on innocent. Their cries don't haunt him as much, their memories and thoughts just make him clamp his horrible fangs down tighter. They're the only ones he doesn't feel bad about. Okay, as bad about. Depending on how much of his mind is his at the moment influences his reaction in a crisis. If he's mostly himself, he's pretty good. As long as there's no blood. Blood is bad when he's already stressed. The farther his mind is gone, the crazier his reaction will be. If there's a lot of blood involved and he's already spazzing out, he attacks like ravenous predator. Combat is the same way. He's okay if he can keep his head. He knows how to fight, but if his sanity slips, it's going to be bloody and violent and somebody or something is probably gonna die. Sexuality: Straight History: Colin was an ordinary average guy in every way. His father owned an autoshop, his mother was a waitress at the local diner. He and his younger sister Rebecca had a normal, happy life growing up in Dexter in their family's small house by the lake. They weren't rich or even well off, but they had enough. He wasn't a great student, but he got by. He had a knack for woodshop and autoshop, and even went to community college and got a degree. Not that he needed it, growing up in his dad's garage. It made them proud of him, he was the first generation to go to college. He and a friend from college, Robbie Kyle opened up their own body shop in a nearby town. Robbie and Becky fell in love. At first, Colin wasn't happy. He was jealous of both his best friend and his sister being more involved with each other than him, but he got over it. They got engaged and he was gonna be Robbie's best man. Their business was doing well and Becky was pregnant. That caused a little bit of a stir, but hell, they were already engaged. Colin was thrilled to be asked to be the baby's godfather. His and his family's lives had never been better. Then, a stupid accident changed everything. He and Robbie were working on Becky's car out in front of their house one sunny, summer afternoon. She'd done something to front axle and so they had both wheels off and the front end on blocks. They knew what they were doing. This was their job after all, and they were dedicated grease monkeys since they were kids. But something happened. Colin had gone inside to grab them a couple of Red Bulls when he heard a lurch and a metallic crunch. When he rushed outside he saw front end of the car had dropped and Ronnie was crushed beneath it. 911 got called and paramedics and police managed to free him, but too late. Robbie lingered fighting for his life, but there wasn't much hope. Becky fainted, and his parents took her home for bedrest. Colin stayed, promising he'd call if anything changed. Shortly after they left, Robbie died. He called them as promised, then walked outside to have a smoke before heading home to take care of his grieving family. In his shock, he barely noticed he wasn't the only person out by the smoking area. He didn't really see the pasty looking old guy who was watching him. He was lost in his own thoughts, wondering why God would let something like this happen. Robbie was a good guy, he took good care of Becky and was thrilled to be a dad soon. He'd never done anything wrong in his life. It was just wrong, and all the shit about God's plan was cutting it. Why had this happened? He remembered throwing his arms wide and demanding loudly to Heaven why. Which was the biggest mistake he ever made. The pasty old guy stepped forward and grabbed him, surprisingly strong. He offered to show Colin the answers he sought, then he felt a sharp pain in his throat. He could feel the world going black, himself getting weaker. He really didn't know what was going on. He tasted blood as he blacked out completely. Unfortunately, he wasn't dead. Not by a long shot. He woke up in a small, enclosed room. Starving, a dull ache gnawing at his stomach like he hadn't eaten in weeks. He had no idea what was going on. Worse still, he wasn't alone. There was a girl in the room, she couldn't have been more than sixteen. She was awake, curled up in a corner, shaking and crying. Colin moved closer to her, trying to be reassuring and ask her if she knew where they were. Thats when he saw the cuts on her skin, small and superficial. But the smell hit him like a brick wall. The hunger eating at him became unbearable and without hesiatation, he attacked the girl. He couldn't believe what he did as he latched onto the girl's throat and starting drinking her blood. This had to be some nightmare and it just got worse. She started screaming and thrashing under his fangs. And he started seeing things. Flashes of a little girl playing, laughing, crying. He could feel her terror and her pain. Her name was April and she was a runaway. He knew this and he had no idea how. Finally, his monsterous body had enough of her blood and he let her go. She was dead. Reeling in horror and confusion and high on fresh blood, he battered at the walls of his prison until he exhausted himself. That was when he came in. Anders Musch, he introduced himself. He told him he was a Nazi interrogtor who had managed to escape persecution. And then someone had given him a wonderful gift before he had died of old age. The gift of eternity. Now he was passing that on to Colin. He told him of his deep interest in suffering and how he planned to watch his child and their victims suffer. He wanted to record it all, for posterity. Write the definitive work on eternal suffering and insanity. Because they were insane, both of them. Unfortunate side effect of the blood running through both of their veins. But it came with gifts. Colin listened, sickened and horrifed and furious. He didn't know what the hell had happened to him, but he knew he wasn't going along with this bastard's plans. He was too weak to fight then, but he'd bide his time and gaining strength. He listened to everything the old man told him, learning as much as he could about what he was. Then, Musch decided it was time for a new experiment. He brought in a little boy off the street for his child's next meal. Colin had other plans. He pretended to be asleep until the old vampire was reaching for the door. Musch had been expecting the attack, but not for Colin's horrible bite to effect him as well. The old Nazi vampire's death is the only one he doesn't regret. Even if the old bastard is rattling around in his mind forever. He dropped off the thankfully unconcious boy at a police station, and just left. He wandered until nearly dawn, then hid in an old warehouse. For months, he tried to avoid feeding. He soon found out he saw things when he touched people or things. Their memories and thoughts and feelings. And everytime he attacked someone, he saw their lives as they struggled and died. It didn't take him too long to realize he was a monster. He was terrified, especially as he felt his sanity begin slipping. He didn't know what to do, how to fight it, how to exist. Then he encountered another vampire, nothing like him. He wasn't crazy, he wasn't mean. He was calm and peaceful. He explained that there was redemption even for the damned and explained some of the 'right path' to Colin. Then he told the younger vampire he was ready to pass onto his next life and asked him to grant him death. Colin didn't want to, but the old monk vampire said he wished to pass some of his peace onto him, to help him on his way. It was one of the hardest things he'd ever done. But it set him on a new course. Colin tracked down his family just in time to find out his sister had given birth to a baby girl. He snuck into the hospital one night to visit his little neice. Seeing Amy, who looked just like her daddy, gave him some more hope. He left his sister a note telling her he wasn't dead (he was sure by then they thought they'd lost him too) and that he'd be watching her and Amy, just like he promised. Now that he had a purpose and a path, his unlife was a little easier. Very little, but any hope was hope. Since the Light of May: Colin isn't sure he's keen to the idea of the Light of May, especially given his bloodline's issues. Not that they were ever good at hiding. Also, the acceptance of vampires at all bothers him. Trade-off his ass, these people have no idea. On the other side, he can now get blood easier and doesn't have to rely on understanding blood dolls and feeding on criminals and people already dying. And maybe, he can even approach his sister and neice and tell them the truth. No, better to stay away, where they're safe from him. But it's a nice dream. Special Skills/Abilities: He has a basic high school education. He was a skilled automobile mechanic in life, he knows his way around an engine. He's good with his hands, he can fix almost any household appliance and woodshop projects are some of his favorites. He can hold his own in a fight, he got into more than his fair share in the bars he frequented. He can cook. He's beginning to learn some Eastern philosophy in his quest to redeem himself, so he has a passing familarity with the concepts of Buddhism and Taoism. Occasionally, he just comes up with a random fact that may or may not be useful due to the Harbringer hivemind or someone or something he's read. Personal Weaknesses: Colin, like all of his bloodline, is insane. He's a bit more lucid than most, but he has his fair share of delusion. He sincerely believes he's sucking out people's souls when he feeds on them, due to seeing their memories because of his psychometry. His mind is full of memories from his victims, from people and things he accidentally touched or brushed. They haunt his daymares, their screams echo through his mind. Also he goes into a frothing rage if confined at all, especially if confined in a small room with no windows. He will rampage around, injuring himself and anyone nearby trying to get free. His precognition talent is very weak in comparison to other Harbringers. It offsets his strong psychometry. He rarely if ever has visions of the future, even with something as big as the Light of May occuring. He's only had one in his unlife and it was related to that huge event. His bite makes it nearly impossible to feed on a willing victim. He goes other places for blood, offering his own to blood banks in exchange for human blood, feeding on people who are already dying, or killing criminals he catches in the act. Sometimes, he can get a blood doll to agree to use a cup. He is often hungry and prone to attacking anyone bleeding in his presence. Colin's self-image is as low as it gets. He hates being a vampire, he hates feeding on people to survive, he hates that his bite is so unbearably painful. He has almost no sense of self-preservation and basically just exists. He suffers from a lot of guilt over the deaths he has caused. He doesn't bother to defend himself until he's forced to, and by then, the monster within him has taken over. Personal Strengths: He has stronger than normal ability with his psychometry for a Harbringer that's so young and lucid, although very little control. He can purposely trigger the power, but most of the time, it just goes off, bombarding his senses with thoughts and memories and feelings in a massive jumble. Sometimes there's useful information in there. It always triggers when he feeds. Always, even if he's drinking blood from a blood bag or a cup. Colin's bite is excruciating painful. When he sinks his fangs into someone, it as is someone is stabbing violently through their entire body. Everyone he's ever fed on died a painful, horrible death, most of them ripped out their own throats writhing in pain, dying of blood loss and shock. While this causes him no end of trouble feeding, it is an advantage if he's attacked and manages to get his fangs into somebody. He's good with his hands. He can fix most household appliances and build simple things like shelves and tables. Family: Nancy and Josh Matthews (parents), Rebecca Matthews (younger sister) Living Conditions: Colin lives on the street or in homeless shelters. He has no income, no job, no purpose except for to find a way to not be a vampire. Career/Job: Drifter Preferred PB: Joe Anderson ETC: I will ALWAYS ASK before he reads anything or anyone's character. Expect PMS and emails and IMs. If you want your pup to interact with him or use his powers for a plot bunny, ask. I am so terribly easy. Awards June 2009   | ||||||||||
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| Account type: | Free Patient | ||||||||||
